Here in Alabama the beautiful, there are days where we may experience many seasons in one day.  Sometimes when I leave for work in February, I may ask myself why did I wear so many layers of clothing this morning?  Just like the weather, relationships go through different life seasons.  Sometimes these seasons may bring about more questions than answers.  

For couples going through different seasons in their relationship, particularly when confidence and clarity are gone, discernment counseling can help provide direction.  For instance, relationship expert Dr. John Gottman states that it usually takes around 6 years of being unhappy before a couple seeks counseling.  By this time, the couple has no confidence in the relationship or clarity as to where they want the relationship to go.  I can imagine that it would feel like I was looking for a buried treasure without a map.

I have observed couples in a discernment counseling session where a different path has been chosen each time.  The common theme I often hear is that couples become so frustrated with each other during the conflict that they end up shutting down and the conflict just goes unresolved.  Repetition of such conflict leads to entrenched attitudes and behaviors. 

How Does Discernment Counseling Help My Relationship?

One may ask, how can discernment counseling help my relationship? Some couples may be uncertain or uneasy about how such sessions differ from traditional couples counseling.  How can 1-5 counseling sessions benefit our relationship?  Here are three facts about discernment counseling and how that session can give you the confidence and clarity you need to move forward.

1)  It Is Structured and Time Sensitive

A discernment counseling session is very structured and time-sensitive, with the therapist helping the couple understand what their contribution was to the relationship.  The therapist helps keep the session on task.  In these ways, discernment counseling differs from couples counseling sessions and can be more effective than a traditional couples counseling session.

2)  A Holding Environment

Discernment counseling provides a holding environment for each person to hear the other person and for them to decide as a couple the future of their relationship.  Sometimes couples can get caught in-between family and friends and the couple may feel pulled to one side or the other.  The couple's emotions are on high alert and they often find themselves stuck back in the cycle of no resolution to their conflict.

3)  Learning Experience for Future Relationships

A discernment counseling session can be a learning experience for future relationships.  In my last discernment counseling session, the couple stated they felt exhausted and both of them were relieved to make the decision together to become divorced.  The couple felt so much pain and hurt from each other that one of the first things they said at the beginning of the session was that neither of them planned on ever being in another relationship.  After participating in the session and having the space to say what they needed to say to each other, the couple could see a path to healing.  They had listened to each other and realized what their contributions had been to the relationship.  The couple walked away with the hope that what they had learned from the relationship was something they would not take into future relationships.

Determine the path for your relationship with Discernment Counseling Birmingham, AL!

If you're feeling stuck in your marriage and want to gain clarity and confidence about its future, discernment counseling can help you stop the pain and heartache of indecision. Don't wait any longer—take action now to find the direction and peace you need for your relationship. To get started, follow these three simple steps:

1. Reach out to Sparrow Counseling for a free 15-minute consultation.

2. Learn more about our certified Discernment Counselor.

3. Get guidance and support to help you and your partner decide the next step in your relationship.

For additional information about Discernment Counseling, visit our blog https://www.sparrowcounsel.com/blog/discernmentcounseling.

Other Services Offered at Sparrow Counseling

At Sparrow Counseling we offer in-person and online therapy in the state of Alabama. In addition to discernment counseling, our team specializes in couples counseling retreats, family therapy, teen counseling, co-parenting counseling, blended family counseling, and more in Birmingham, Alabama. Learn more by checking out our FAQs and Blog!